Obtain a balanced schedule, almost like a cat… Stay awake for two hours, sleep for 2 hours, repeat!
Run away from all forms of sanitation… soap, hand sanitizer, etc.
“Wash” your face with only a wet washcloth… no soap.
Listen to Morgan Wallen on repeat.
Take a single bite out of a piece of food and put it back.
Drink straight out of the milk container.
Run away from Febeze at full speed because the smell isn’t refreshing to you.
Chase cats around the yard…even though they obviously don’t enjoy your presence.
Refuse to drink creamer in your coffee if it’s not frothed.
Drive 90 mph in a 30 mph as if the law doesn’t apply to you.
Crank your music as loud as the speakers will go without blowing them.
Wear hoops at all times… no ifs, ands, or buts.
Squint cuz you can’t see because you refuse to wear your glasses.
Get called Cryley by your family members.
Master the “Famous Eyeroll” that you inherited from your mom.
-Squid
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