Eat whatever and don’t care.
Binge watch netflix.
Watch romance movies.
Cry because you don’t have that love.
Repeat mantra: “I am an independent woman that needs no man!”
Die on the inside.
Eat a pint of ice cream.
Adopt ten cats.
Third wheel it everywhere or just stay at home with your family: Cat Benetar, Secret Agent Randy Beans, Luke Skywhiskers, The Great Catsby, Kitty Kitty Bang Bang, Schrodinger, Puma Thurman, Paul McCatney, Rick Catsley, and Mittens. NEVER GONNA YOU GIVE UP RICK CATSLEY!
Plot revenge on couples. Wait for Valentine’s day. Run in restaurants, throw a cup of water on unsuspecting men, and shout, “I KNEW YOU’D BE HERE! YOU D-BAG!”
Buy a boyfriend pillow.
Let your cats sleep with you.
Suffocate on cat fur.
-AJ
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