At the Tip of my Finger

I look around as
Greeting hugs surround everyone
My best friend comes
Arms open but
All that surrounds me
Is a feeling of emptiness

The students head
To a pep rally
For all the sports teams
The gym fills with applause
The sound's there but
I am just hitting air

Arriving at the hospital
Is as stressful
As it gets
I get pricked like always
With an IV needle
But no pain follows

Out of surgery yet again
Waking up full of fear
Wondering what's next
Laying in a hospital bed
Believing to be dying
No feeling of fear or sorrow
Just a sense of nothingness

-L.J.J.